I Drank My Tan for 5 Weeks. Here's What Actually Happened.
I have been the palest person in every group photo since roughly 2011. Burn, peel, back to fluorescent — that was my entire relationship with summer. So when I decided to try a tan you drink, I made myself one promise: I'd photograph every single week, and I'd write down exactly what happened. Including if it was nothing.
Why I even tried this
Because I had tried everything else. The mousse that left my ankles looking dip-dyed. The gradual lotion that turned my palms a color I can only describe as "traffic cone adjacent." One memorable spray tan that a coworker gently asked about, using the word "Oompa Loompa." I've spent hundreds of dollars proving that the problem wasn't my application technique.
Then I kept seeing women talk about TANVIA — a dropper bottle you add to your morning coffee. No mitt, no smell, nothing touching your skin at all. I rolled my eyes. Then I read that there's a 60-day guarantee where they refund even an empty bottle, and figured the only thing I could actually lose was my skepticism.
Full honesty: nothing. Three drops in my coffee every morning, tastes of absolutely nothing, and by Sunday I looked exactly like the "before" I've always been. Maybe a little warmth in my face? But I wanted to see warmth, so I don't trust it. Diary entry, day 7: "possibly delusional."
This is where it got interesting. No photo this week (I was traveling for work), but two things I wrote down: the redness I permanently carry across my cheeks was gone, and my boyfriend said I looked "healthy" — unprompted, which has literally never happened. Not tan yet. But different.
A coworker asked if I'd "been away." I had been to the office and one baby shower. The color is subtle here — a warm, golden undertone instead of my usual pink — but it's visible, and it's completely even. Face, neck, chest: one tone.
The part that broke my brain: I checked my knees and ankles — the two places every self-tanner I've ever used goes to die — and they're the same tone as everything else. Of course they are. There's nothing ON my skin to pool or streak. The color is coming from underneath, so it physically can't be uneven.
Look, I'll keep it simple: I am never touching a mitt again. The color kept building all week — deep, golden, and still completely even. My freckles are still there (I like them). Three people this week assumed I'd been on vacation. I have been to a baby shower and a Costco.
What's actually in it
I checked before I started, because I'm not drinking mystery liquid. The main players are beta carotene — the pigment that makes carrots and tomatoes their color — plus L-tyrosine and vitamins C and E. The idea is simple: instead of staining the surface of your skin like every mousse and spray does, the carotenoids build a warm tone from within as they accumulate. That's why it can't streak and why my palms stayed pristine.
- Builds gradually — visible warmth in weeks, not hours
- Nothing touches your skin — nothing to streak
- Three drops in any drink, zero taste
The five weeks, recapped
If you're pale and skeptical like I was: the 2-bottle pack covers the same 5+ weeks I documented here, with margin — and it's 50% off right now. And the 60-Day Glow Guarantee means if your week 5 doesn't look like mine, you get a full refund — empty bottle and all. That guarantee is the only reason a lifelong skeptic started. The photos are the reason I kept going.
Comments · 96
Top commentsthe "possibly delusional" week 1 entry is the most honest thing I've read in one of these. ordered because you DIDN'T pretend it worked in 3 days
week 4 is the part nobody talks about. my ankles have looked dip dyed since 2019. currently on week 2 and my redness is calming down exactly like you said
did the same experiment in may lol. week 3 is exactly when my coworkers started asking. it really does just keep going if you keep taking it
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